Las Vegas Travel - Loathing Las Vegas

Vegas is no different – it is big and it is awe-inspiring, but there are a few misconceptions that need clearing up and one or two warnings that need to be heeded before you can truly enjoy the place. I wish I'd had them.

Firstly, there is this myth that you need to have money to enjoy Las Vegas . It is true that all of the enormous hotels that occupy the strip are expensive, but the city also needs to cater for those that have inevitably lost all that they came with. Just a few minutes walk from the main parade tourists can find accommodation at much more affordable rates. The rooms may not be as comfortable as those in the New Yorker or Paris Las Vegas but all Vegas lobbies are equipped with the necessary bar and mini-casino.

Personally, I had rolled in from a three week camping holiday in and around the Grand Canyon and I found a motel willing to accept me unshaven and shabby. A quick shower later I was ready to hit the town. It didn't take long, however, for my smile to begin to fade.

The first thing that you notice is the unbearable heat. People tend to forget that Las Vegas is built in the middle of the desert and therefore has this warm waft of air blowing over it's pedestrians. It's a bit like opening an oven door for the first time after it has been pre-heated, but constant and irritating. The only way to avoid it is to duck into one of the Casinos. All of the major buildings are interlinked with air-conditioned tunnels and walkways effectively meaning that, when in Vegas, you need never go outside. This solves the problem of the unbearable heat but, in doing so, creates another one.

Vegas is full of Casinos, which are, of course, full of slot machines. These machines provide a background ringing noise that stays with you for the entire trip. The sound is a combination of coins going in to machines, levers being hauled down and the pinging of the display as it settles on lemons, cherries and bars. Occasionally these machines will also provide the sound of money coming out the other end and large whooping tourists scooping their winnings into paper cups. If you were to combine all of these sounds and then multiply it by 500 you'd be left with a thumping headache.

There are places to escape to in Vegas. Retreating to the hotel room is one option, but what is the point in coming if you are not going to try and enjoy it? Personally, I found myself standing on the air-conditioned bridge between the MGM Grand and the New Yorker, looking backwards and forwards down the Strip. It becomes more impressive when your view is not disturbed by the heat and down-and-out locals trying to stuff catalogues into your arms. Should they succeed, incidentally, you would be left with a phone book for local prostitutes and sex-lines, albeit posing as an “entertainment guide”.

Vegas is full of good places to eat, as well as not so good but cheap places catering for those that haven't been lucky. Mealtimes are a great excuse to get away from the noise and the heat, but you can't eat all day so my advice is to keep moving. Try and take advantage of chances to be entertained rather than lose your money. The rollercoaster that wraps itself around the New Yorker is great fun and it is worth getting tickets to see one of the city's famously extravagant shows.

In the end the fact that I was only there for a couple of days was a blessing in disguise. Forty eight hours is just enough time for Vegas to remain entertaining. As I flew out of the airport, which inevitably has slot machines at every turn, I can remember being grateful that I didn't have to spend a fortnight there. Perhaps I would have enjoyed it more under different circumstances; had I been forewarned about the heat and the noise (obvious when you think about it). Would I like to go back one day? Possibly, but only when I have enough money to stay in one of the plusher hotels, with a view of the strip from my window.